February 14, 2014

Freedom?

Having five kids has taught me one undeniable fact: I am NEVER free. If the calls of my name, the need of my constant vigilance or the 5 am wake up calls weren't enough to convince me of that fact the constant throng of strangers and loved ones telling me I'm nuts for willingly incarcerating myself in this homebound life would. I am NOT free by worldly standards. I would readily ascent to that fact, my life is not about me! Nothing I do at almost any point of the day is usually about me! (Obviously as a human I am not totally selfless nor is everything I do, but a lot of things are.) in fact the internal struggles away from self and toward service are very real!  But it ALL clarifies the reality that I am NOT free by our cultural standards. 

How does our culture view freedom? Our "idea" of freedom has become uniquely American over 3 centuries. We hold that doing whatever we want without the interference of others (esp government) is the epitome of freedom. So being autonomous! Owing nothing to anyone! Being able to persue my own truth--as the saying goes! To embrace my power! ALL these ideas encompasse our cultural indetification and definitions of freedom and my lifestyle doesn't mesh with this, as anyone who knows me sees easily. 

Too many people see that I have willingly and knowingly incarcerated myself. I have saddled myself with five very needy and high energy children. Plus I homeschool them (gasp) which furthur limits my ability to follow the cultures message of freedom. And my husband is a pastor, more people to take my freedom and serve. I also hold fast the message of truth. I'm limiting my freedom as far as culture and perception is concerned. But what if I'm not really incarcerated but truly more free than those who have held tightly to the reigns and rule of their lives?

What if freedom is about sacrifice? What it freedome is about laying it ALL down instead of hold it tightly? What if our definition of freedom is just another way of redefining hedonism or narcissism? What if seeking to serve and be spent for others really is the freedom we all seek?

When people look at me and think "why not just send them to school and give yourself a break?" I think the focus of freedom is too presently motivated. What I mean by that is is that so often the judgements we make concerning the freedom or lack of freedom in others is really only looking at a completely unsustainable reality--today. Freedom really isn't motivated in just today. 

If we define freedom by being free to spend and be spent in the cause of eternity then our entire perspective changes. If we define freedom in terms of others centered and not me centered then our lives are transformed. If the man who lived the freest life in history is the paradigm of our idea of freedom then we see that in laying it all down we see we are truly free. 

When we look at our chance of service as a sign that our bondage has ended. If we see the weak and needy-- not as impositions but as reminders of our former life of slavery to self. When we notice less of us and more of others there we truly see freedom! If we have been able to freely lay ourselves down we have tasted the freedom we will one day enjoy with him. Just as our savior was free to spend himself for our cause! Not only do we live the true gospel of freedom-- the most selfless act purchased our shackled lives out of eternal prison not to be served but to sacrifice ourselves for the good of others as a living testimony to what has taken place historically and internally! 

So maybe I'm not the one serving everyday in the bondage of a crazy life! Maybe I'm simply revealing what REAL freedom looks like? Maybe you aren't as free as you believe?