confessions of a closet list maker...

I make lists. I suddenly realized that I was a serial list maker while doing some work on the bible study I joined in June. I make lists about everything:

Books I should read,Books I have read, Dinner menu lists, Prayer lists, Organizational lists, Chore lists, To-Do lists, Crafting lists, When we have the money lists.

You name it, I have written it out in list form!

I am certain many of you are laughing right now, since you probably never guessed that Larissa makes lists. Everytime I get a pad of paper or a day planner or a prayer journal I end up with lists inside. I like to have a chance to check stuff off, I love that sense of accomplishment that comes from knowing I have completed something. But where did it go terribly wrong? I took my passion for list making, not an error in and of itself and then morphed it into a tool for righteous living and personal holiness.

If my prayer life is lagging--make a prayer list and pray through it! If my personal study time isn't makeing the grade--make a list of books of the bible I should read to compensate. Wanting to be completely honest, I looked through a few of my journals and found a list of requirments for potential mate. Luckily I had a faithful friend who encouraged me to let God be God (Thanks Juju!). Lists have truly bound my spiritual life for many many years.

I am not saying that making lists is inherently wrong or sinful, but it certainly isn't a path toward holiness for me and cannot even slightly be confused with the spiritual disciplines. I am afraid that so often I equate accomplishement with godliness. Godliness can only be attributed to His work in my life, His justifying work, His holy and salvific nature. I quite frequently forget the facts that "by grace I have been saved..." and if it is by grace I have been saved then it is also by grace that I will be able to reflect His image, it is by grace that I grow in maturity, it is by grace that I persevere to the end. His work not mine, no matter how many lists I make and how many accomplishments I am able to check off.

How often am I personally reminded that I return to the law so quickly? Only to realize that of Him, to Him, through Him are ALL things, therefore to Him be all glory and honor and praise! I am so thankful that I am insufficient in every area because He is enough....grace is enough for me and for you, too!