(J. R. Miller, "Home-Making" 1882)
Parents! You are fashioning the destinies of immortal souls!
What we want to do with our children, is not merely to control them and keep them in order—but to implant true principles deep in their hearts which shall rule their whole lives; to shape their character from within into Christlike beauty, and to make of them noble men and women, strong for battle of life. They are to be trained rather than governed. Growth of character, not merely good behavior—is the object of all home governing and teaching. Therefore the home influence is far more important than the home laws; and the parents' lives are of more significance than their teachings. Whatever may be done in the way of governing, teaching or training—theories are not half as important as the parents' lives. They may teach the most beautiful things—but if the child does not see these things modeled in the life of the parent—he will not consider them important enough to be adopted in his own life.
www.gracegems.org
September 28, 2009
September 25, 2009
The Hypocrite in the Pulpit and Pew
Some time ago I wrote the following post for my ministry blog and since then it has gotten a fair amount of hits. So I thought it would be helpful on some level for our family, friends, and visitors who frequent this blog. I hope you find it encouraging ~ WD
“I have no desire to go to church and be with all those hypocrites!” Have you ever heard this statement or something very similar to it? My guess is you have. Probably so many times, just thinking about these words makes you want to vomit. What is your response when people say this? Maybe you just shake your head in disgust and walk away. Maybe you just completely shut down without another word. For those of you that desire to do more than shake your head or shut your mouth I encourage you to read on because we can say and do much more than that when people play the hypocrisy card.
The first thing we must tell someone who makes this statement is that they are very insightful for noticing the presence of hypocrites. In fact, every single one of us are hypocrites. Every pastor, every church member, and every person who says they don’t want to be with the hypocrites at church is a hypocrite. Every one of us has said we do such and such but there are times when we simply don’t. You may say that you are faithful in reading your bible every day, but on that one day you fall asleep just as you were preparing to do it you have officially become a hypocrite. Personally, I am okay with acknowledging my hypocrisy and you should be to. I don’t like my hypocrisy but if I refused to acknowledge it than I would be missing an opportunity (more on this in a second). We need to tell people they are right in their assessment of the presence of hypocrites in church, but we need to tell them that they, too, are just as hypocritical. The conversation might go something like this:
Joe: Go to church with you. No thanks, I know some of the people there and they are a bunch of hypocrites.
You: You must know everyone at church then?
Joe: What? No, I only know a few people there but the ones I do know say that they do this and that but I know for a fact they don’t always do that.
You: Well, Joe, based on how you describe a hypocrite, I don’t know anyone at church who isn’t a hypocrite. In fact, I, too, am a hypocrite.
Joe: I didn’t mean you, I meant some other people I know.
You: Well, now, you can count me in that number of hypocrites you know at my church.
Joe: I didn’t mean you, I really did mean some other people.
You: No matter what your opinion may be of me, Joe, I am a hypocrite and if you were honest you would have to acknowledge that you, too, are a hypocrite. We all say we are going to do certain things but then find ourselves doing the opposite. Wouldn’t you agree, Joe?
Joe: I never thought of it like that before but I think you have a point.
But our conversation should not and must not end there. The second thing we must do is explain that there is a difference between our hypocrisy and the other person’s hypocrisy. Here is the opportunity you have that I mentioned earlier. For a church-goer (and by this term I mean a church-goer that truly loves and lives for Christ), their occasional hypocrisy has no power to condemn them. As the apostle Paul says (quoting David from Psalm 32) in Romans 4:7-8 “Blessed are those whose lawless deeds are forgiven, and whose sins are covered; blessed is the man against whom the Lord will not count his sin.” You see, the difference between a Christian and the one who pulls the hypocrisy card on that Christian is not that his or her hypocrisy is worse than the Christian’s. Rather, the Christian knows that their hypocrisy cannot condemn them because Christ’s death and resurrection was more than sufficient to secure their right standing before a Holy God. In Christ every believer’s hypocrisy has been forgiven. Does Joe have that same hope? Hopefully, the conversation can continue along these lines:
You: We all are hypocrites, Joe. The Bible calls this sin and we are all guilty sinners in the eyes of a Holy God. The only difference between you and me is that I am trusting that Jesus Christ’s death secured forgiveness for all my sin and that my hypocrisy will not condemn me. Do you have that hope for your hypocrisy, Joe?
Joe: I mean I think I am a pretty good person so I am just trusting in that.
You: Part of the reason there are so many hypocrites at church is because these hypocrites have realized that their good is only a mirage. The Bible says “no one does good.” Just read Romans 3:10-12. People are not good people, they are rebels, specifically rebelling against the One who made them. Your “good” is not what you think it is Joe and it definitely isn’t good enough to eradicate your hypocrisy. Only Christ can do that. That is why I am at church. I want to worship my Savior whose death has provided me forgiveness, not just for my hypocrisy but for all my sin.
This dialogue would never be possible if we choose to allow the comments of others to disgust us or discourage us. The best thing for us is to seize such an opportunity and be honest about ourselves, all the while being forthright about our Savior. I don’t want to be a hypocrite. I don’t rejoice in acknowledging my hypocrisy. I don’t set out to play the hypocrite. But, nevertheless, some days I am a hypocrite and I do rejoice in knowing that I won’t stand condemned by that hypocrisy. Instead, I will bow and worship as a forgiven hypocrite made a saint by the blood of Christ Jesus!
“I have no desire to go to church and be with all those hypocrites!” Have you ever heard this statement or something very similar to it? My guess is you have. Probably so many times, just thinking about these words makes you want to vomit. What is your response when people say this? Maybe you just shake your head in disgust and walk away. Maybe you just completely shut down without another word. For those of you that desire to do more than shake your head or shut your mouth I encourage you to read on because we can say and do much more than that when people play the hypocrisy card.
The first thing we must tell someone who makes this statement is that they are very insightful for noticing the presence of hypocrites. In fact, every single one of us are hypocrites. Every pastor, every church member, and every person who says they don’t want to be with the hypocrites at church is a hypocrite. Every one of us has said we do such and such but there are times when we simply don’t. You may say that you are faithful in reading your bible every day, but on that one day you fall asleep just as you were preparing to do it you have officially become a hypocrite. Personally, I am okay with acknowledging my hypocrisy and you should be to. I don’t like my hypocrisy but if I refused to acknowledge it than I would be missing an opportunity (more on this in a second). We need to tell people they are right in their assessment of the presence of hypocrites in church, but we need to tell them that they, too, are just as hypocritical. The conversation might go something like this:
Joe: Go to church with you. No thanks, I know some of the people there and they are a bunch of hypocrites.
You: You must know everyone at church then?
Joe: What? No, I only know a few people there but the ones I do know say that they do this and that but I know for a fact they don’t always do that.
You: Well, Joe, based on how you describe a hypocrite, I don’t know anyone at church who isn’t a hypocrite. In fact, I, too, am a hypocrite.
Joe: I didn’t mean you, I meant some other people I know.
You: Well, now, you can count me in that number of hypocrites you know at my church.
Joe: I didn’t mean you, I really did mean some other people.
You: No matter what your opinion may be of me, Joe, I am a hypocrite and if you were honest you would have to acknowledge that you, too, are a hypocrite. We all say we are going to do certain things but then find ourselves doing the opposite. Wouldn’t you agree, Joe?
Joe: I never thought of it like that before but I think you have a point.
But our conversation should not and must not end there. The second thing we must do is explain that there is a difference between our hypocrisy and the other person’s hypocrisy. Here is the opportunity you have that I mentioned earlier. For a church-goer (and by this term I mean a church-goer that truly loves and lives for Christ), their occasional hypocrisy has no power to condemn them. As the apostle Paul says (quoting David from Psalm 32) in Romans 4:7-8 “Blessed are those whose lawless deeds are forgiven, and whose sins are covered; blessed is the man against whom the Lord will not count his sin.” You see, the difference between a Christian and the one who pulls the hypocrisy card on that Christian is not that his or her hypocrisy is worse than the Christian’s. Rather, the Christian knows that their hypocrisy cannot condemn them because Christ’s death and resurrection was more than sufficient to secure their right standing before a Holy God. In Christ every believer’s hypocrisy has been forgiven. Does Joe have that same hope? Hopefully, the conversation can continue along these lines:
You: We all are hypocrites, Joe. The Bible calls this sin and we are all guilty sinners in the eyes of a Holy God. The only difference between you and me is that I am trusting that Jesus Christ’s death secured forgiveness for all my sin and that my hypocrisy will not condemn me. Do you have that hope for your hypocrisy, Joe?
Joe: I mean I think I am a pretty good person so I am just trusting in that.
You: Part of the reason there are so many hypocrites at church is because these hypocrites have realized that their good is only a mirage. The Bible says “no one does good.” Just read Romans 3:10-12. People are not good people, they are rebels, specifically rebelling against the One who made them. Your “good” is not what you think it is Joe and it definitely isn’t good enough to eradicate your hypocrisy. Only Christ can do that. That is why I am at church. I want to worship my Savior whose death has provided me forgiveness, not just for my hypocrisy but for all my sin.
This dialogue would never be possible if we choose to allow the comments of others to disgust us or discourage us. The best thing for us is to seize such an opportunity and be honest about ourselves, all the while being forthright about our Savior. I don’t want to be a hypocrite. I don’t rejoice in acknowledging my hypocrisy. I don’t set out to play the hypocrite. But, nevertheless, some days I am a hypocrite and I do rejoice in knowing that I won’t stand condemned by that hypocrisy. Instead, I will bow and worship as a forgiven hypocrite made a saint by the blood of Christ Jesus!
September 22, 2009
10 Reasons Why...
10 Reasons why I love my husband so much and know that he is the greatest blessing that the Lord has seen fit to grant a superior sinner like me.
1) He is the best friend I have ever had--bar none. He has absolutely proven that it is possible to be a completely loyal, loving, sacrificial, kind, sympathetic and tender friend. Only a good God could have interviened in the life of my husband so completely to bless me so deeply. He has been and continues to be the best friend God ever brought into my life, even when he drones on about the genetive or ablative cases in greek (or at least that's what I think I hear!) he is still a fabulous friend!
2) He is patient. I think that my husband is simply THE most patient man ever! Especially since he still loves me!
3) He is smart. My husband has learned a whole lot over the time of our marriage and has had the grace to share that knowledge (in my own language) with me! Even when they are concepts that are eons outside of my understanding he takes time to explain these things so I can understand. Bless him!
4) He is generous. Let's face it, we aren't getting rich by worldly standards in the ministry, but he still trys to be generous with the money we do have. Not just to me and the kids, but to many others. It is such a reminder to me to be a good steward and have a generous heart.
5) He is merciful. Honestly there have been times and situations where, had it been me in the midst of them I would have given as good as I got, but he has not done so. He chooses frequently to pursue relationships and situations that are not easy (as I am daily proof) with an exceedingly merciful heart. Have we mentioned that mercy isn't my greatest spiritual gift?
6) He is funny. Even though often I DON'T laugh, he is still funny. Unless the jokes on me...well then....it's not that funny. ;)
7) He is a reader. If my husband didn't pursue a book often I doubt I would have read even an iota of the books I have been exposed to and absorbed. He is always reading something to challenge him and strech him and I admire his dilligence.
8) He loves our family. If my husband never gets all the things I ask from the store, forgets to refill the toilet paper, and even leaves his socks on the floor for the next 60 (here's hopin'!) years, the fact that he loves spending time with us would be enough! I love spending time with him, but I Love even more that he loves hanging with a bunch of crazy nuts like me and my four munkins!
9) He is quick to seek reconciliation and quick to forgive. I, admittedly, am not so quick, but I am always hearing his words in my head when situations crop up (as they inevitably do) where I am involved in a disagreement (often not with anyone in my household). "What does it help to prolong forgiveness, Larissa, you're gonna do it anyway so why not do it quick? Jesus forgave you!" Yeah, yeah, yeah....So it turns out I am listening!!
10) I just do. It may sound simple and unromantic, but I just love the big goof! I don't know how we came together, unless it is a work of an almighty God and I don't really know why I love him so fiercly now, but the fact remains that I simply do. I love him deeply and I know I always will.
AND A VERY HAPPY 31ST BIRTHDAY, WILLIAM!
1) He is the best friend I have ever had--bar none. He has absolutely proven that it is possible to be a completely loyal, loving, sacrificial, kind, sympathetic and tender friend. Only a good God could have interviened in the life of my husband so completely to bless me so deeply. He has been and continues to be the best friend God ever brought into my life, even when he drones on about the genetive or ablative cases in greek (or at least that's what I think I hear!) he is still a fabulous friend!
2) He is patient. I think that my husband is simply THE most patient man ever! Especially since he still loves me!
3) He is smart. My husband has learned a whole lot over the time of our marriage and has had the grace to share that knowledge (in my own language) with me! Even when they are concepts that are eons outside of my understanding he takes time to explain these things so I can understand. Bless him!
4) He is generous. Let's face it, we aren't getting rich by worldly standards in the ministry, but he still trys to be generous with the money we do have. Not just to me and the kids, but to many others. It is such a reminder to me to be a good steward and have a generous heart.
5) He is merciful. Honestly there have been times and situations where, had it been me in the midst of them I would have given as good as I got, but he has not done so. He chooses frequently to pursue relationships and situations that are not easy (as I am daily proof) with an exceedingly merciful heart. Have we mentioned that mercy isn't my greatest spiritual gift?
6) He is funny. Even though often I DON'T laugh, he is still funny. Unless the jokes on me...well then....it's not that funny. ;)
7) He is a reader. If my husband didn't pursue a book often I doubt I would have read even an iota of the books I have been exposed to and absorbed. He is always reading something to challenge him and strech him and I admire his dilligence.
8) He loves our family. If my husband never gets all the things I ask from the store, forgets to refill the toilet paper, and even leaves his socks on the floor for the next 60 (here's hopin'!) years, the fact that he loves spending time with us would be enough! I love spending time with him, but I Love even more that he loves hanging with a bunch of crazy nuts like me and my four munkins!
9) He is quick to seek reconciliation and quick to forgive. I, admittedly, am not so quick, but I am always hearing his words in my head when situations crop up (as they inevitably do) where I am involved in a disagreement (often not with anyone in my household). "What does it help to prolong forgiveness, Larissa, you're gonna do it anyway so why not do it quick? Jesus forgave you!" Yeah, yeah, yeah....So it turns out I am listening!!
10) I just do. It may sound simple and unromantic, but I just love the big goof! I don't know how we came together, unless it is a work of an almighty God and I don't really know why I love him so fiercly now, but the fact remains that I simply do. I love him deeply and I know I always will.
AND A VERY HAPPY 31ST BIRTHDAY, WILLIAM!
September 21, 2009
Went in AGAIN today...
So we had another appointment with the doc to check on the progress of Kace's broken arm. It is healing better this week but they informed me today that after the full arm cast they will put him in a half arm cast for another 6 weeks and then either a removable cast or a splint until they are comfortable that his arm will not break again. This means over 3 months in this thing! I can hardly wait for the scent of his arm to start permeating the house we all live in! We might be thrown us out for being unsanitary! I cannot believe how well he has broken the arm! Jeese, I suppose he had a mind to make sure he did it right. Or at least in a manner that was going to be memorable! I sure hope it will be strong when they finally remove all the contraptions, just imagine how much paraphernalia we will have at the end of this process, but as I told a friend, I am not one to keep a smelly cast for sentimental values, why you say? Have you met my son? Have you ever smelled his FEET?
September 15, 2009
Transparency: Is it really worth the risk?
"...Your intimate knowledge of about even your friends and family members is usually far less than you realize. Most of us have very few relationships that break the surface" --Robert Jones, Uprooting Anger Page 140.
Now I know this is a provacative statement that is meant for us all to sit up and think about how many people actually know our hearts? How many people know what is tempting you to sin today? How many people know what you are fearing today? How many people know what you are hoping in today? Oh, so many questions could be linked to these few. Does even your spouse know what is really happening, or simmering, or blooming in your heart? I want to challenge all of you to be transparent! Not on the internet alone (especially since that is what we are using as a medium right now), talk to the people around you and say something that is of deep importance to your own heart. No more "how are you's" just simply pricking the surface! Ask and answer questions that will draw you into community with other believers that will make you more real, more relatable. How can you pray for someone else in a manner that will true change you or them, unless you allow your heart to be probed and also engage in probing others hearts. It is of vast importance that we take the great risk of opening our hearts to one another.
Now I know this is a provacative statement that is meant for us all to sit up and think about how many people actually know our hearts? How many people know what is tempting you to sin today? How many people know what you are fearing today? How many people know what you are hoping in today? Oh, so many questions could be linked to these few. Does even your spouse know what is really happening, or simmering, or blooming in your heart? I want to challenge all of you to be transparent! Not on the internet alone (especially since that is what we are using as a medium right now), talk to the people around you and say something that is of deep importance to your own heart. No more "how are you's" just simply pricking the surface! Ask and answer questions that will draw you into community with other believers that will make you more real, more relatable. How can you pray for someone else in a manner that will true change you or them, unless you allow your heart to be probed and also engage in probing others hearts. It is of vast importance that we take the great risk of opening our hearts to one another.
September 11, 2009
Jesus: A Purifier of the Putrid
"...having made purification for sins..." Hebrews 1:3
What has Jesus done for you? Has He become a granter of covetous wishes for you? Lord, my car is 5 years old so can You please give a new one. Has He become the chariot that will whisk you away from the fires of hell? Some 20 years ago, Lord, I walked that isle at church and prayed with the pastor so even though my actions reveal I never really loved You, I know Your goodness will take me to heaven in the end. Sound familiar? If not, take a seat this Sunday in a chair at a mainline evangelical church. Listen to the pastor and scan the prayer requests. To many pastors and churchgoers Jesus is a genie who came to make possible whatever we want to indulge in or escape from. Is this really what Jesus has done for you?
This Sunday morning I hope to answer this question as I preach through Hebrews 1:3-4. Though there is much more to this passage than answering this question, I could not resist writing a short post on the perfect, once for all, cleansing act of Christ.
Let's begin with the word rendered "having made." This is my translation. If you have a translation that makes this word seem like Jesus is still "making" purification or cleansing for sins then the impact of this word is lost. Jesus is not continuing to make purification for sins because He has already done so. The text does not say how He did it, it simply says He did. According to the writer of Hebrews, it is a finished act that occurred in the past. What the Old Testament priests had to do over and over, year after year, Jesus, as the best and greatest Priest, did in one fell swoop.
And here is what He accomplished -- "purification for sins." In the 3rd Edition of A Greek-English Lexicon of the New Testament and Other Early Christian Literature (BDAG for short) this word translated "purification" is said to mean "cleansing from inward pollution." I love this definition. Do you see what Jesus has really done for you? He purified your putrid soul. If our souls could be laid bare before our very eyes, we would forget about that new suit we obsess over or that get out of hell free card we want because neither could do anything about our sinful hearts that are black as coal and more foul than the nastiest septic tank. We need inward cleansing for our sinful hearts and we need it now. But you need not look any further. It has already been done.
Thank You Jesus for doing what we really needed done the most. Outside of your cleansing we stand condemned before God. Give us the eyes to perceive this time-bound but timeless truth. We know if we really do believe you made us pure then we will live for you and not abandon the relationship You made possible for us to have with You. Help us Jesus to cut through our self-deception and see ourselves as You see us. Helpless sinners who must turn to You, the only One who provided a perfect purification for our sins. Amen.
September 10, 2009
Post Op
Kace's Operation went well. He had to be intubated which I think made him more grumpy than he would have normally been, but he came out 15 minutes before expected. He is a bit swollen and also very tired. We are on strict rules to keep him immobile for the next day or so. And Parks are stricktly off limits. We are thankful for all your thoughts, calls, prayers (especially) and all of you who have helped us during this time. Thanks so much!
Larissa (for all the crazies especially Mr. Kace!)
Larissa (for all the crazies especially Mr. Kace!)
September 09, 2009
No More Monkies Jumpin' On The Bed
the night the break happened.
The xrays showing the severity of his break.
this morning before nap time.Yesterday our family minus one went to the ortho clinic in Overland Park's Children's Mercy Clinic. There we found out from the doctor that Kace has a serious break in his arm. It is called an angulated fractor of both bones in his left forearm. This means that the only way to set this fracture is a surgery. We go in tomorrow morning early, but he will still be hungry by the time they put him out, to have this procedure done.
Please be in pray on our behalf at this time. That we will not be tempted to worry and when tempted (as I am right now) we would fight that temptation through prayer. Also please pray that this procedure would "take" if it doesn't take we will have to repeat this next week. Please pray his bones would heal this first time. Please also pray for comfort for my little guy. I love my babies so much and I hate that they are at times in a lot of pain. He has been given some serious meds but it still doesn't hurt to petition the one who made his body to bring comfort to his body.
Thanks! Larissa for the Clan.
September 04, 2009
Luck of the Draw
During th tour of Missouri Assembly at school today silas won this awesome bike! Who would have thought he would have his name drawn!
September 03, 2009
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